The PM, Tony Blair, has briefed reporters on the possibility that the, as yet, undiscovered Iraqi weapons of mass destruction may have some kind of effective cloaking device.
Mr Blair, who has never given up on the idea that Iraq did have such weapons, told a packed press conference that the US military had been working on cloaking devices and believed they were feasible in the long term. He said: "We have spoken time and again of the dangers posed by Iraqi scientists and the Iraqi military machine, it's perfectly possible that they were in advance of the American's multi-billion dollar teams in this area."
Blair also pointed at precedents for cloaking devices in science-fiction and recent James Bond films declaring: "Science fiction, no matter how outlandish it seems, can often become science fact, we should be extra vigilant against all possibilities, we must establish where these WMDs are."
When asked by reporters if he could be wrong about Iraq having had WMDs, Tony Blair said: "You know, this is a question that haunts me now and will continue to haunt me until such time as they are found. But let there be no doubt, these weapons did exist, I know they did." When pressed by reporters how he could have been so sure, the PM made an astonishing revelation saying: "Well, since you continue to push me on this issue I can tell you that I have seen them, I saw them in a dream. But let me say this..." He went on: "It was no ordinary dream, it was a clear message from God. Although I am now starting to accept that I am probably the only person in the entire world that believes WMD will be found in Iraq."
Blair left journalists with a number of photos, taken at the time of the war, which, he claimed, showed invisible weaponry.
5th July 2004
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“I am delighted that my challenge has been backed by over 1/3 of all labour MPs and that I that I secured the support of 14% more MPs than I needed to spark a leadership contest. Or to put it another way, that is a 70% increase on what was required, allowing for seasonal adjustments due to absenteeism which is measured by an index based upon a propensity for sickness and holiday averaged out over a 36 month period, divided by the average age of an MP squared. These figures could not send out a clearer message.”
The notoriously frosty relationship between the PM and his Chancellor had sunk to new lows in the weeks leading up to todays announcement. In an off the record interview with Heat Magazine, Brown is said to have criticised Blair for being a “spineless spin master whose supposed superiority has seen success only sporadically”. When the alleged leader of the opposition, Michael Howard, confronted Mr Blair in the Commons repeating Brown’s remarks, the PM could not hide his anger:
“My message is simply this – in my mind, if it is anything more than mere mischief making by the most malicious magazine on the market, then myself and my honourable friend must meet so he may make known his misgivings to me.” Blair did add that he was confident that the Chancellor had been misquoted. In private however, according to an unnamed cabinet source, Blair was said to be seething at the magazine article and at one stage threatened Brown saying “I should beat you to death with your own leg”.
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